Haitian Orphans Come Home to Colorado

They're home! They're home! They're home!

Wants And Needs

If we had all we wanted, we wouldn't have what we really needed. God always gives us what we need, not always what we want.

If God Knows Everything, Why Pray?

My wife was feeling very poorly. A pinched nerve had developed into a condition where any movement was very painful. We called up a friend who is gifted in healing and asked if he could come over. He said "Oh, that's why the Spirit was telling me to make dinner for you guys!"

That evening, we sat together over pork chops and yellow rice. The kids had finished early and were playing downstairs, the boys trying out their Nerf swords on each other. As can happen, play fighting turned to real fighting when the blows got too hard or they were taken too personally, and the sword play broke off into other things. That night, as I was tucking my son into bed, his emotions still hadn't really cooled. I walked him through the steps of forgiving the persons in absentia. As I did, I told him that God wanted to hear what had happened and what he felt and why. 

"But God already knows these things, Dad. Why should I tell him what he already knows?" he asked.

"Because He wants relationship with you," I told him. 

"I don't get it."

"Well, why else would we ask God to heal me? He knows I need healing. He knows I want to be healed. But He wants me to come to Him and ask Him." It's the situations we can't handle that drive us to connect with Him, and that's what He wants. He wants to hear how our day was, even though he was there for every millisecond. He loves us and went to the trouble of creating mankind just to risk you saying "yes!" to Him. He wants that daily connection, even hourly connection with your heart. What moves us, moves His heart too. Eventually, it will be that what moves His heart will move us as well. That's relationship. That's love. That's the Kingdom.

Letters from the Field: Obamavilles And The Fruits Of Repentance

Dear Friends,

How are you? How was your Christmas? Mine was incredible! A family stepped forward and offered to help with our Christmas gifts this year, buying nearly everything we wanted and everything we needed. They are a family that dearly wants to hear God's voice in their lives and it excites me to see it.

Have you heard about Obamaville?

The name of the town reminds me of a classic Jimmy Buffet tune, a favorite of my cousin's. This is a real sign of America's Second Great Depression. Iconic pictures of the 1930s tent cities, in some cases called "Hoovervilles," dot the news. Like the early years of the last depression, economic measures designed to slow or even reverse the decline may not be all that helpful and in some cases may actually hurt the economy.

I am no expert, but having a blog means having a point of view. My great friend, Andrew, shares similar circumstances as my own, unable to work because of his physical condition. He told me on New Year's Eve what I had instinctively known and remembered from high school economics. The numerous bailouts the government has engaged in is against the fundamental rule of capitalism. If AIG, et. al, truly failed financially, the government should have let it fail and go into bankruptcy. That's the reason for bankruptcy courts. Procedures exist for failures like that, procedures that might have better served the American people. Instead, the executives are bailed out by the one entity that should have put them in court to defend their actions. This is corruption, plain and simple.

In times like these, it is not enough for us to simply pray that God help the needy and suffering. Nor is it enough to fast, to humble ourselves before God and expect Him to hear us. It requires a fundamental heart change. It requires individual and corporate repentance. It requires what God lays out in Isaiah 58.

Isaiah 58:1-8

(the Message paraphrase)

Tell my people what's wrong with their lives,
     face my family Jacob with their sins!
They're busy, busy, busy at worship,
      and love studying all about me.
To all appearances they're a nation of right-living people—
     law-abiding, God-honoring.
They ask me, 'What's the right thing to do?'
     and love having me on their side.
But they also complain,
     'Why do we fast and you don't look our way?
     Why do we humble ourselves and you don't even notice?'

"Well, here's why:
"The bottom line on your 'fast days' is profit.
You drive your employees much too hard.
You fast, but at the same time you bicker and fight.
You fast, but you swing a mean fist.
The kind of fasting you do
     won't get your prayers off the ground.
Do you think this is the kind of fast day I'm after:
     a day to show off humility?
To put on a pious long face
     and parade around solemnly in black?
Do you call that fasting,
     a fast day that I, God, would like?

"This is the kind of fast day I'm after:

• to break the chains of injustice,
• get rid of exploitation in the workplace,
• free the oppressed,
• cancel debts.

What I'm interested in seeing you do is:

• sharing your food with the hungry,
• inviting the homeless poor into your homes,
• putting clothes on the shivering ill-clad,
• being available to your own families.

Do this and the lights will turn on,
     and your lives will turn around at once.
Your righteousness will pave your way.
The God of glory will secure your passage.
Then when you pray, God will answer.
You'll call out for help and I'll say, 'Here I am.'

If you want to see a change you can believe in, if you want to see God answer prayers, don't just fast and hope that He blesses you. Don't just hunger after God. Model your heart and actions after Him! Engage those around you and work to ease their suffering. If you see injustice, work to end it! If you see your employees hard pressed, stop work until they catch their breath. God does not saddle you with a heavy burden, does he? He does not bicker and fight with you, does he? Can you honestly say you follow Him when you live in ignorance of His most fundamental motives? We may claim to love the Lord God with all our passion and prayer and intelligence and energy, but until we love others as well as we love ourselves, we cannot honestly claim the title Christian, literally "Christ follower."

This is heavy stuff, but God does not pull any punches when we've missed something this elementary. Christians in business cannot place profit above and beyond the humanity and charity God commands from us all. As Marley lamented in A Christmas Carol, "Business! Mankind [should have been] my businesss!" Indeed, Scrooge himself walked in repentance by placing a very human interest in his employee Bob Cratchit and his family. The complaints that socialism and fascism brought against capitalism were very similar to the complaints that the three spirits of Christmas brought to Scrooge, that men in capitalism only enrich themselves by exploiting the working poor. The very reason America was successful in the first place was that men lived by the morality of their faith, putting into practice the charity and kindness that their faith professed. Alexis DeToqueville, in Democracy in America, put it this way,

Despotism may govern without faith, but liberty cannot. How is it possible that society should escape destruction if the moral tie is not strengthened in proportion as the political tie is relaxed? And what can be done with a people who are their own masters if they are not submissive to the Deity?

If we profess freedom, and we do, then we must live by God's morality. Instead of seeking what we can get out of our employees, our "human resources," should we not treat them as good or better than ourselves? This change must start in our hearts, work into our minds, and out through our hands. Obamaville may be a ghost town in years to come, but only if we get the message.

A brother from a different mother,

Steve

Benched

I have not had too many "up" days recently. A lot have been spent laid out in bed, searching for some way to lay my body that didn't cause pain. I don't have an explanation. I can't readily point to something and say, "I overdid it and I shouldn't do that." It's just been one long string of ow. Ow, this hurts. Ow, that hurts. It wouldn't be so bad if the fatigue wasn't the super-industrial quality that gives me 30-120 minutes before it knocks me out again. It's just one more day in the life of Fibromyalgia. On the up-side, I found a good page that really spells out to folks what FM is like, thanks to Adrienne Dellwo of About.com.

The most frustrating part is knowing that I missed a day of my kids lives with nothing but a dented mattress to show for it. They only have 120 more before their birthdays (all in April), and they're changing every day. I feel like because I can't keep my head from the pillow, I'm failing them as a father. This isn't reality, of course. I have no choice in the matter. It's just the way my emotions get the better of me when I miss time with them. I can certainly relate to those who are imprisoned, those who can't beat their addictions, and those like me who struggle with a debilitating illness. You see life passing by and it hurts to know that you're not a part of it every day.

Yet, I have to believe that God will give me the ability to be there for my kids when it matters. I need God to give me the strength and stamina to be a father and pastor to my family. I need Him, period. He will supply all my needs. His grace is sufficient for me, for His power is made perfect in my weakness. He's given me everything I need for life and godliness. My hope will not disappoint, my faith is steadfast and firm, not because I am powerful, but because He is all-powerful in me, my weak and tattered body. He will deliver me from this body of death through Jesus Christ, our Lord! I cling to this, even in the darkest of times.

Take comfort in Him. He will meet your every need.

Dealing With An Angry Heart

As a father and a Christian, I have a unique opportunity to help my children tap into one of their greatest assets: their relationship with the Holy Spirit. Jesus said that He would send us the Holy Spirit who would guide us into all truth. The Spirit is a counselor, a companion and a direct link to God’s heart for us.

Tonight, my eldest was having one of her battles against her horrible tension headaches. She literally feels like the muscles are going to break her skull. After I assured her that wasn’t going to happen, I asked her if she had been talking to God about her worries. She said it seemed He wasn’t listening. When I dug deeper, it came to light that she didn’t want to say to God some things that she was feeling about Him.

One obstruction to a life free in Christ, living by His Spirit, is refusing to be honest with God about ourselves. We may feel like we aren’t worthy of His attentions. We may feel angry at, hurt by, or even abused by Him. Failing to bring these things front and center in our prayers with God is being dishonest with Him. We may feel like He doesn’t want to hear why we’re angry or that He will strike us down with an even worse affliction if we “complain.”  Beloved, if your heart cannot bear the wound, don’t you think your Creator wants to help, to heal you and comfort you? Doesn’t He already know your heart and what you feel? Refusing to bring these things out and deal with them in His presence is preposterous and ignorant of the One Who loves us.

God really wants us to be honest about our feelings with Him. He’s a big God, and he can take the vitriol and fire of an angry heart. The dissolution of pretense is the solution.  Being honestly angry with God is something we all need to be at some point. It’s a natural outflow of human hearts saved by Love while still living in a fallen world of sin.

When we’re honest and forthright with our anger and frustrations, God will do one of two things with your heart. He will either help you understand the nature of the problem and lead you in the direction that will be most in line with His will for you, or He will comfort you and cry with you, giving you the grace and solace that only God can give. They call it the peace that transcends understanding. It may not be what you want, but it is definitely what you need, and God’s heart always gives you what you need.

So if you’re driving down the same ugly road, your fuel is low, and the lights on your dash just couldn’t get any redder, pull over. He’ll be coming along and you can let Him help. There’s one condition. Only you can pop the hood and let Him look you over. There’s no anger or condemnation in His eyes. You’re His child and you always will be. But you need to let Him be the one to guide you out of the bad part of town you’re in and learn how to let Him maintain your heart. He’s an excellent mechanic, and I trust him with my life, and more importantly, my children.

Incommunicado In Colorado

I suppose some explanation is in order for why I haven’t been writing nearly as much as I used to. It relates  to my disability. I have arthritis in my spine between my neck and mid-back. The pain is usually located between my shoulder blades and below. For me to have to hunch over a keyboard for more than a few moments brings on spasms that no pain killer or muscle relaxant can touch, at least not without affecting my thinking patterns. In other words, if I want to type, I must either endure extreme pain or wander about the corridors of my mind aimlessly, Neither of which sound very appealing.

I have been dictating, as I am right now, but this is a new challenge because the mental process that I use to speak is noticeably different than the mental process that I use to type. It’s an odd situation, because I use both to produce written words, yet the end product from one process is noticeably different from the other. I don’t speak like I type, and because I type better than I speak, it has been a slow process of retraining my mind.

Additionally, Windows Speech Recognition doesn’t take kindly to partial phrases and afterthoughts. If I use shorter strings of words, speech recognition has less context that it can use to make sense of what I say. Therefore, I have to put together complete sentences a lot of the time. This isn’t how people around me normally speak, least of all someone like me. What’s worse, my sense of concentration drops quite a bit when I’m speaking. I don’t know what it may be called, but my lack of concentration when I'm trying to communicate is frustrating!

Unless I get some sort of adaptive equipment that allows me to type pain-free, I am going to have to continue this retraining of my mind. It feels a bit like learning a second language. Eventually, I will get better… At least I hope so. I’m going to continue to write, regardless, because writing allows me to express myself and speak what’s on my heart. Hopefully, the labor to express myself will get easier. Knows? Maybe this computer will eventually understand what I have to say and how I say it.

The other source of delay is my sporadic network connection. Wireless is so wonderful when you have it! Until I do, I have to blog offline and wait until I can connect to upload. Forgive me, but this may cause some "blog bursts" of two to five entries at once. Still, as always, I hope you enjoy it.

Never Abandoned In The Floodlands

In a former life that I now dimly remember, I occasionally got free music as a sales associate for The Ark Bookstore in Denver. Normally, the samples were of new, relatively unknown groups that their label was trying to push. There was the rare exception, however, and those were moments that made the low wages and long hours almost worth it. Chief among those moments was when our Sparrow representative stopped by with a pre-release copy of Steve Taylor's 1993 album, Squint. It was the last—so far—studio album that Taylor would release, capping a decade-long career in the Christian music industry. Most folks don't know who Steve Taylor is. However, most Christians have likely heard the Newsboys' song, Shine, which Steve produced and wrote the lyrics to. In fact, Steve's partnership with the Newsboys is what most credit them for their success.

Steve's music has had a huge impact on my life. Songs like Hero, Meltdown, On The Fritz and so many others fed my spirit when I faced religious hypocrisy and pretentious spirituality at a young age where I needed truth and solidarity. Truth confronts, but it also comforts. One of the best examples is in the song, "Curses," where the chorus (echoing Psalm 37:25) repeats,

Never have I seen the righteous forsaken
Never abandoned in the floodlands
Never have I seen their children out begging
Never have I seen them slip through your hands

This simple refrain would echo in my mind every time I faced worries about making mortgage or buying groceries. It remains a reminder that not only is God faithful, but that I am not the first of his children to encounter financial difficulty.

There is something else about the chorus. In this modern,"lower-middle class" lifestyle, I tend to forget the meaning of floodlands. Today, modern civilization has flood control. Rivers that used to rage and ravage towns and cities are now harnessed and regulated by dams and reservoirs. The floodlands were areas that were normally dry but prone to extensive inundation. As a result, no one who could afford to build would build in such an area. They tended to be vast areas with thick undergrowth crisscrossed by a myriad of foot trails. The only inhabitants were the poorest of the poor, vagrants living a nomadic lifestyle and eating hand-to-mouth. If a river were to flood, they would be among the first victims, sometimes the only victims. Being abandoned in the floodlands would never be by choice. It would be the last stop before dying.

God is always mindful of our situation. He never lets us slip through His hands. We make mistakes, but He never does. Also, notice what it doesn't say. It doesn't say that we would never see the floodlands, or walk through them. He may have us pass through the floodlands for any number of reasons, not the least of which would be to reach out to those are also in desperate need. Yet here is the one thing that brings me such comfort: we will never be abandoned! We have a God who carries us through the fiercest storms and the highest waves. Most importantly, when it's all over, we get to go home with Him. That's worth any trek we might face here on earth.

Just in case one thinks I'm blowing smoke, I'll offer a subjective proof, one of many small miracles God has done for me and my family. Two weeks ago, my mind turned to Christmas. It dawned on me that we might not make mortgage, let alone have the ability to purchase gifts this year for my children. Rather than fret, I told God about it and asked Him to please provide Christmas gifts for my kids. Later that week, I got a call from our church saying that a family wanted to bless a family in need with Christmas presents and asked if I would be interested. "Are you kidding? I was just praying about that this week!" I told them. Needless to say, everyone was blessed at how God worked the whole thing. He usually isn't so blatant and obvious. God uses subtle and practical ways for us most of the time. But once in awhile he offers us unmistakable signs that He's there. With God, we are never abandoned.

There Goes the Sesame Street Neighborhood

My wife came up and told me that Sesame Street had done another spoof. This time it was a skit called "Desperate Horse-wives." I got a groan when I asked if the characters were less than neigh-borly.

In all seriousness, I'm not that thrilled with how the folks at Sesame Street parody network TV shows. While I am sure that the creators mean simple and innocent fun with their skits, I believe it also sends the message that the shows they represent are normal and acceptable in normal households. I'm not sure how normal we are, but Desperate Housewives is a show that we do not let in our house. My children know that when Extreme Makeover Home Edition is over and they hear, "Previously on Desperate Housewives..." power to the television is to be immediately terminated. It's almost comical how they scramble to turn it off, as if they were diving on a live grenade.

While it may not be a grenade, many TV shows are painfully difficult for us to watch these days. Some of the shows are so corrosive, I wonder how anyone can possibly watch them. Consequently, some nights we simply don't turn on the television set. Instead, we will read a good book or play a game together, if we don't split up to do separate things. We avoid the shows not because we like feeling superior or cerebral, but because we've found that these shows actively interfere with our hearts and minds.  

^8-9Summing it all up, friends, I'd say you'll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. Put into practice what you learned from me, what you heard and saw and realized. Do that, and God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies. (Philippians 4:8, The Message)

I can't come out with a list of TV shows that I think are bad or good. The verse above should be more than enough for the average Christian, especially when it's paired with the conviction of the Holy Spirit. Each person is responsible only to God for decisions like these. However, Jesus did give us a special charge with children.

"And if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to be thrown into the sea with a large millstone tied around his neck. Mark 9:42 (NIV)

To me this verse means that God takes the destruction of children's innocence very seriously. This is why the Sesame Street skits irritate me. It feels like they're playing with fire. Look smart all you want, but I would prefer if they would just stick with "C is for cookie," and the yip-yip monsters.

What? You've never heard of the yip-yip monsters?

Yip Yip

| MySpace Video Thanks Jodi!

An Afternoon With My Daughter

I spent this afternoon with my 6 year-old daughter. Instead of my thinking of what I couldn't do with her, we read, watched movies, and hung out. We even played three serious rounds of hangman. She brought out her plastic menagerie, a plastic tote stuffed to the rim with 50 or 60 plastic animals of every exotic origin.

She holds up a wildebeest. “This,” she says with all the certainty of a sunrise, “is a cantalope.”

It doesn’t matter what else is going on in the world that day. We spent the afternoon blissfully unaware of everything but each other’s company. I think God craves that time with me sometimes. Then again, perhaps he’s simply watching me with the interested eye of a bemused parent as I say, with all the certainty of a sunrise, “I have it all under control.”

My daughter Shiloh makes my heart laugh. She makes me very happy with just how she smiles. I could go for days, weeks, months, or even years without seeing the sun shine, but not one day without seeing her smiling face. I’m a very blessed father to have her. There’s no one else in the world that I would want in her place.